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Sujet du devoir
Bonjour,
Je dois écire une parodie d'un ou plusieurs contes en anglais pour mercredi prochain. J'aimerais de l'aide pour le corriger svp. ^^
Merci d'avance !
One night, as the girls sang at the edge of her windows, a young boy, who seems to fall from the sky , was floating in front of her.
"What is your name, miss ?" asked kindly the boy
"Rap...Rapunzel" said the girl shyness
"My name is Peter, Peter Pan. I come to Neverland, a world where there are only free and happy children. I know that you are not happy. So, if you want, you can come with me" ended Peter, readring out to her hand.
She thinks for a moment. The young boy was right, she is unhappy. Rapunzel decided to take his hand and fly with him in the air.
Ten minutes after they left, Peter and Rapunzel arrive at the Lost Boys's camp, the camp of Peter and his friends.
Afeter several days in Neverland, she noticed that there were only teenagers, all of whom seem to be stuck in their eighteen years, or almost. There are adult pirates on the island, who follow a man called The Captain Hook.
One evening, while the teenagers slept, Hook and his pirates attacked the camp and kidnapped Rapunzel to take him to their ship, the Jolly Roger.
The girl had fainted on the way and didn't wake up until the next morning. As she woke up she felt a hand patting her hair.
"Peter ?" asked her
No, it wasn't Peter. It was a handsome young man. He had black short hair, with two vibrant hazel eyes. He seems tall and strong. Rapunzel was completely charmed.
"Who...who are you ?"
"Im the Captain Hook. Don't panic darling, I want just save you. Peter Pan is a horrible boy, he cut my hand and he ate him !"
Rapunzel was a naive girl. She then remained quietly with the captain and his pirates, whitout wondering why they where all young when they were older the day berfore.
Over time, the former princess fell in love of Hook. They had married on the sea and had a daughter shortly after they called Lily.
Rapunzel was finally happy. But one day, Peter Pan meant delivering the girl and her baby, althought she didn't from now on want to return any more with him. The pirates and the Lost Boys fought on the ship. Regrettably, trying to return Rapunzel with him, Peter fell and pushed inadvertently the girl. She fell into the sea and was eaten by a crocodile.
Peter and the Lost Boys leave the ship with the baby of Rapunzel.
"I will find you and I will kill you Peter Pan !"roared Hook
Peter ignored him and joined his camp with Lily in his arms, and few tears on his cheeks.
Où j'en suis dans mon devoir
Je n'ai fais corriger que le premier paragraphe (je ne l'ai donc pas posté)
3 commentaires pour ce devoir
Suite...
She thaught (passé et pas de "for") a moment. The young boy was right, she was unhappy. Rapunzel decided to take his hand and flew with him in the air.
Ten minutes later, Peter and Rapunzel arrivedat the Lost Boys's camp, Peter and his friends' one. (réorganisation de la proposition)
After a several days in Neverland, she noticed that there were only teenagers, all of whom seemed to be almost stuck in their eighteen years. (Sinon tu peut mettre "all of whom seemed to be under eighteen")There were adult pirates on the island, who followed a man called (pas de "the") Captain Hook.
One evening, while the teenagers slept, Hook and his pirates attacked the camp and kidnapped Rapunzel to take her (c'est une fille) to their ship, the Jolly Roger.
The girl had fainted on the way and didn't wake up until the next morning. As she woke up, she felt a hand stroking (je crois que ça se dit comme ça) her hair.
Super merci beaucoup Ello23 !
Si quelqu'un d'autre est chaud pour corriger la fin ça serait top ^^
Ils ont besoin d'aide !
- Aucun devoir trouvé, poste ton devoir maintenant.
Bonjour. Voila le début. Après je ne suis pas tout à fait bilingue donc j'ai peut-être oublié des erreurs.
One night, as the (si tu n'as pas encore parlé de la fille, il faut remplacer le "the" par "a") girl sang at the edge of her window (il n'y a qu'une fenêtre j'imagine), a young boy, who seemed to have fallen from the sky , was floating in front of her.
"What is your name, miss ?" asked the boy kindly.(ordre des mots)
"Rap...Rapunzel" said the girl shyness
"My name is Peter, Peter Pan. I come from Neverland, a world where there are only free and happy children. I know that you are not happy. So, if you want, you can come with me" ended Peter, readring out to her hand. (???je n'ai pas compris le sens)