Anglais redaction

Publié le 8 oct. 2011 il y a 12A par Anonyme - Fin › 15 oct. 2011 dans 12A
5

Sujet du devoir

J'ai une rédaction a faire et je l'ai faite mais je ne suis pas forte en matière de correction des fautes, j'aimerais savoir si vous pourriez me corriger :$

Où j'en suis dans mon devoir


Il y a 5 heures. #
Bonjour, j'ai un texte un rendre en anglais et j'aimerais savoir s'il été possible que vous m'aidiez a corrigé les fautes :$ Merci d'avance !

Last night was both the most terrifying and most beautiful night of my life. The weekend was planned as long and boring and I didn't have the courage to try to make it slightly less horrible. Friday is the day of garbages and I always put them out at ten o'clock (PM).As always I took the lift, and I admit a handsome young man on the 2nd floor, when suddenly the lift stopped. I wondered what I had done to deserve a weekend as pathetic as that. The good thing is that I was not alone. The bad thing was that the alarm button of the lift was not working and that the other occupants of the flat were either on vacation or in week end. After all, I would just spend the night with the boy who does not displease me. After an hour of shouting and insults towards the inevitable (in addition to phone calls wich did not happen), we resign ourselves to sit down. It was very cold so I asked him if I could stick to him to avoid to die of exposure. He nodded. We ate the chocolate he had in his pocket and we talked all night.
I woke up at eight o'clock. Someone walked into the hallway, I asked him for help. At nine and a half hours exactly, we were free. I thanked my companion night for his kindness. He stared at me without saying a word, without blinking. And unexpectedly, he kissed me.



8 commentaires pour ce devoir


Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
-ligne 4 and i met a handsome young man. et pas (and i admit a handsome young man)

-ligne 11 in addition to phone calls which did not happen( tu a oublier un h a which)

Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
Je remplacerai The week end was planned as long par "the week end was planned long in advance and was boring"

Oui, effectivement ce n'est pas I admit mais I met

Ligne 10 : It was not so bad to spend the night with this handsome boy .... We shouted for almost 1 hour, trying to find some help et j'enleverai in addition to phone calls that did not happen car je ne comprends pas bien

Ligne 11 - tu as oublié un "d" à resign. Il faut enlever "avoid to die of exposure" mais dire "so that I could warm up " = pour que je puisse me réchauffer.

La fin de la rédaction est bizarre, tu as l'air de dire que quelqu'un marche dans le couloir mais on a l'impression que tu n'es plus dans un ascenceur. "companion night" n'est pas juste.
5
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
Friday is garbage day and I always take it out at ...


the other residents were on vacation or away for the weekend


...who looked okay

I asked if I could get close to him to get warm
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
after an hour of shouting and swearing in vain....we resigned

at exactly 9.30

je préfère: my companion for the night
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
mais bravo pour ton anglais
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
Merci a vous c'est vraiment gentil ! :D
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
Merci a vous c'est vraiment gentil ! :D
Anonyme
Posté le 8 oct. 2011
Merci a vous c'est vraiment gentil ! :D

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